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Sex After Having a Baby

Has there recently been a new addition to your family? If so, congratulations! There is nothing more exciting or rewarding than becoming a parent.

As rewarding and as exciting as it can be to be a new parent, you may want to start returning to your normal routines. Depending on your relationship with your wife, that routine may have involved daily or regular sex. Unfortunately, many men are disappointed to learn that their sex life is not going to be what it was like before, at least right away.

If this is your first child, you may not be familiar with how sex after a baby works for women. If that is the case, a few helpful tips are outlined here.

Space and Time

Most importantly it is important to give your wife space and time. She may not be ready for sex yet, emotionally or physically. In fact, did you know that women need time to heal after having a baby? Many doctors recommend waiting at least a month before having sex after giving birth. With that said, your wife may be different. She may be ready to resume intimacy sooner or later than the average, recommended time frame.

Limit Expectations

In keeping with giving your wife time, it is important to not have high expectations right away. These expectations should also include more than just intimacy. As we’ve said, having a baby is exciting and rewarding, but it can also be very overwhelming for new parents, especially Moms. Late night feeding sessions and fussy babies may prevent your wife from wanting to initiate sex, as well as getting many of her daily tasks completed, like cleaning the house or having dinner prepared on time.

Speaking of which, if you want to improve the intimacy in your relationship and not just in the bedroom, be sure to help your wife out. This may involve taking a late night feeding session with your new baby, doing the dishes, cooking dinner, and so forth. Many new moms feel so helpless and overwhelmed immediately following the birth of a baby. Do not let your wife feel this way. The kind gestures of helping on your part may improve your relationship and in more ways than one.

Don’t Push

Try not to not push your wife into having sex when she is uncomfortable or not ready to do so. Remember, it does take women time to heal after having a baby. It is also important to take other factors into consideration. Is your baby sleeping in your room? If so, your wife may not feel comfortable being intimate then. Your wife may also not be ready to hire a baby sitter or even allow a trusted relative to care for your child. This means that a romantic weekend or night away is often out of the question. Most new Moms needs months or even longer before they are ready for this big step.

Be Patient

Since there is a good chance that your wife may not be ready to resume intimacy in your relationship, it is important to be patient. Instead of dwelling on not having sex, work for it. Use the time to “wow,” your wife all over again. Do so with romantic gestures, such as preparing a nice dinner at home, flowers, and love notes.

Content Created/Medically Reviewed by our Expert Doctors
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